dealing with negativity

[mimi]

I am just starting on the path towards getting banded and although most people are supportive, there are some who are so negative, of course they are mostly thin people who have never had a weight problem. I am so excited to end a losing battle and finally get control of my weight issues. I'm tired of defending myself to the nay sayers, any advice.

[SheryBery]

Hi Mimi & welcome! You shouldn't have to defend yourself---this is your decision and I'm sure you've not made it lightly. This is what you feel is best for your life. Remember that. Don't worry about what others may say, just keep your mind on your goal of a new life. And don't ever let anyone make you feel that you're taking the "easy way out" by having surgery. It's by no means, easy! It's still hard work, but this band is a tool to help you stay in control and to learn new habits. That's the way it's been for me at least. Surround yourself with people who support you, and ignore the others. And this is a great place for support!
Soooo....when is your surgery?? Keep us updated!

[mimi]

I have a long road ahead before surgery, I go on 5/15 for my first visit, I was told at the seminar that it would be 6 mos. before surgery, it seems so far away!

[SheryBery]

The time will go faster than you think. Just stay positive and start changing some of your habits now. And hang out here!

[mimi]

thanks sherybery! I am definitely a very positive, happy-go-lucky kind of gal and I will definitely take your advice to start changing bad habits now, I have already made a few with exercise, using smaller plates, so I eat less and staying out of the kitchen while my hubby is on a carb binge!

[SpookyJulz]

Mimi~
I went to my first seminar July 06. I should have had my surgery in Oct Nov. However, the psychologist I went to said that I had had too many things happen lately and that I needed to get my antidepressant under control and to see another psych. He told me a lot of garbage. I got depressed because I thought it was not going to happen. In Jan I got a call from the surgeons office asking if I was still going to have the surgery. When I told them what the psych had told me the nurse said that all he put in the report was that I needed to get a letter from my referring physican saying that I was stablized on my antidepressant. So, I got the process rolling again. I was banded April 2nd.

If you are totally serious about having surgery. Don't let any delays hold you back. Don't allow the nay sayers to change your mind. If they keep it up don't tell them anything. Wait until you are losing and they want to know what you are doing. The skinny people who have never had to diet don't have a clue as to what we go through. The skinny people that I know who are against surgery have normally been the most unhealthy people I know. They eat horribly, they do not exercise, and yet they continue to make us feel bad about ourselves. Don't let them take your power.

Best of luck!! Keep your chin up!! B2G is a great support system for you!

[Neal R.]

Hi and welcome Mimi! Remember your doing this for yourself and to better and prolong your life. Don't let others get you down. I was lucky and very positive reactions, but if someone were to tell me I took the easy way out, I would say hell yes I did! Its not easy, but it does make weight loss and maintainance possible were as before it wasn't. Everything else we do in life, we are looking for the easiest, most efficient way of doing things, why should this be any different. Just my 2 cents Looks like your off to a great start with the changes your already making. keep us updated.

[mimi]

thanks spooky, I am really glad I found b2g, you guys are great!

[mjhopeful]

I have also dealt with negativity. To the point that I haven't even told several people because they were so negative when I mentioned it before. These people don't think twice to spend hundreds and thousands of dollars of hair care, tanning, boob jobs, and face lifts. Not to mention the tummy tuck because they gained 18 lbs during pregnancy. To me this procedure is no different than physical therapy after an injury or an insulin pump for a diabetic. This will make each of us healthier and able to live full happy lives. They can all go straight to h***

[SpookyJulz]

MJ~
I so agree with you. I have said the same thing about diabetics and insulin. My daughter is a type 1 diabetic she needs an insulin pump to keep her healthy and alive. I feel the same way about anti depressants, some pain meds, and weight loss surgery. For me it's those things or wanting to die all the time. I'm not suicidal I could never take my own life. I've just gone through many times where I did not want to live.