Darn it!! :(

[believeinme]

I went to the shore today with my family and it was a lovely day...The DARN part is that I broke my beach chair while sitting in it! This was humiliating:sad:

I'm working on getting my band and have only lost a few ponds since focusing, but this was a real downer.

I'll try to turn it around for tomorrow and walk even longer than usual.:wink2:

anyone else want to share, to make me seem less of a fool?

[redgrldj]

ok in a little while you will look back on this and laugh.. trust me..I have had my heel get stuck in a crack of the sidewalk and fallen on my arse splitting my pants , right in front of the resturant we had just finished eating at with my family... OMG my sfamily laughed sooo hard LOL...

[PattiDi07]

I twisted my ankle and fell flat on my face while on vacation a few summers ago. Ended up needing surgery to repair the torn tendon in my foot, but at the time of the fall, I was absolutely mortified. And all my husband could do was yell at me "What the hell are you doing?!?".... Yeah, like I meant to fall on my face! We laugh about it now, though. My kids were hysterical then, and still giggle about it ... "remember that time, Mom, on vacation when you fell".... teeheehee, snicker, snicker, snicker... So I feel your pain today, but you're on the right track, right? Hang in there. It will get better. :)

[Rini]

okay how about this one....racing down the stairs to get to the train and just as the doors are about to close i slip fall and fall face front right at the endge of the platform..dangerous but kind of funny too and totally embarassing

[redgrldj]

LOL rini... I am the worst friend ever.. I will ask if someone is ok, then laugh at them...

Ok aa long time ago.. me, my BF, my older sis and my teenage niece went out and were ummm taking pumpkins unlawfully.. My friend went running out of the patch and fell off the curb.. She landed on the pumpkin and it popped out smacking her in the face.. My sis laughed so hard she pee'd her pants... I made her walk the mile to our parents so she could borrow pants.. I wouldn't let her in my car..

[Cathy S.]

:hahalaff:

[redgrldj]

LOL just made a post on Facebook to remind my BF about that night... There was sooo much more that happened that night LOL..

[believeinme]

thanks girls, I do feel a bit better.....!

[redgrldj]

OK funniest thing ever.. LOL .. My oldest sister and my gay cousins tranvestite boy/girlfriend both were sitting on my parents porch swing.. Neither one is umm tiny LOL... All of a sudden you hear a creak and then the heavy duty metal links on the swing snap.. This was during a party in the summer.. tons of people drinking.. it was hilarious.. My sis was pissed we were laughing and blamed it all on my cousins"friend".. have you ever seen an overweight "Queen" try to get up gracefully in a dress.. LOL... ok I know I am being mean, but it was funny...

[Cathy S.]

I can't just lurk and laugh without sharing mine, so here goes....I have broken 2 toilet seats in my bathroom. Somehow I manage to tweak them to the side and they break at the hinge from my weight. :ohwell:

[WildAlaskaG'ma]

I can't just lurk and laugh without sharing mine, so here goes....I have broken 2 toilet seats in my bathroom. Somehow I manage to tweak them to the side and they break at the hinge from my weight. :ohwell:

Me too!!! Damned cheap seats !!

[Cathy S.]

Judy, you don't know how glad I am to hear that I am not the only one who has trashed the toilet!

[redgrldj]

as long as the toilet doesn't break when you sit on it , it's all good...if my seat were to break I would blame it on my kids LOL...

[dolchanmom]

I have also broken toilet seats. I get so worried that one day I might pinch my butt skin between the seat and toilet. Can you imagine how much that would hurt with over 200 lbs of weight on it?

Brandy

[gregken77]

Ok got you all beat. Was up on my roof fixing some shingles and I was very close to the edge. I was just about finished and was sweating really bad. I stood up to whipe my forhead and at the same time a big gust of wind blew across the roof and hit my body hard. I lost my balance from the wind and off the roof I went. There is a tree branch close to the edge that I have seen my children play on many times. Im falling off the roof so I have to act quickly. I jumped with all my might grabbing for the tree branch. So there I hang ---and Im hanging there thinking , "Ok great Mr. genious now what"? Well Ill tell you ' Now what". Seems I was alittle to much weight for that little branch and it snapped like an elephant balancing itself on a toothpick. I fall screaming like a little school girl and Oh you should have heard the wife laugh! I didnt think it was all to funny at the time. She still laughs about it when she tells people the story. Guess you had to be there! Greg K

[Cathy S.]

Brandy, with the last broken toilet seat I DID pinch my butt several times before my hubby fixed it! I can't blame the broken seat on the kids because it's in MY bathroom!

[PhotoNut]

Good thing all fat people are jovial and have a great sense of humor, huh? :pound:

[MyGenesis]

Cathy...
You have only broke 2 seats...I have lost count! LMAO (while sitting on the floor in the bathroom....hahaha!)

[trudy]

:pound:LMAO!!!!! Been there done that...I hate pinching my skin on the toilet seat after I pretty much rip it off with my weight!!!!

[Cathy S.]

Trudy, I've never looked, but I'm sure there are a few scars on the hienie from the toilet seat biting me! Maybe we should start a support group: Toilet Seat Trashers Anonymous!

[newlifeat57]

OMG!!! LOL I am so glad I read this thread.... I can't tell you how many seats I've trashed. I have a friend that had this little delicate "fancy" seat that I have refused to sit on, for fear of breaking it. So I have lifted it and used the bowl to hoover over....not comfortable, but at least it saves me from embarrassment. I try to remember to use the toilet at home before going to visit her. Thanks for the laugh this morning.

[catmom50]

You guys! To hear we are so normal is very enlightening. We all suffer the same embarassements don't we. We are mortified at the moment, but laugh about it later.
Don't people depend on us to make them laugh????
Keep up the stories. I for one am really enjoying reading your posts in this one.

[alucy1967]

Last year we went to an amusement park, and my DH talked me into getting on the skycoaster. You go up 150 feet, and free fall on a bungy cord. When you go all the way down, it starts you soaring through the air at 60 miles per hour, (what the heck was I ever thinking). My son, and about 15 of our employees were standing below, watching. When I hit the bottom and starting swinging, I pee'd myself. So, I tell my DH what happened, and as we soar overhead, he yells to our son, and the other 15 employees below, "Your Mother Just Pee'd Herself!" Needless to say, our day at the park was finished, and I walked out with a bag covering my butt!!! LOL (they also got it on video, I am hoping that it somehow gets lost:)), the next week at our company meeting, anybody want to guess what we watched? The laugh was on AJ that day!

[alucy1967]

Thanks everybody, I got a good laugh before bedtime on this stormy Sunday night!

[Cathy S.]

My husband couldn't believe that I shared the toilet seat breakage on here! In fact, he never even knew that I broke them! LOL I happily told him that I wasn't alone and that there were other members of Toilet Trashers Anonymous!

[newlifeat57]

I can now say I belong to TTA--LOL

[PattiDi07]

Me, too..... three times ...... So here goes.... Hi, everyone, I'm Patti..... ("hi, Patti"). Hi... And um, well, see, I, um.... I break things sometimes..... um, yeah, just things, you know.... um, well, okay... um, toilet seats..... I am Patti, and I break toilet seats. The one at work... yep, that was me. The one in my upstairs bathroom.... yep, that was me, too. And oh yeah... the one in the downstairs bathroom... yep, guilty as charged. Never pinched myself, but I did hear it when a co-worker broke a toilet seat and was pinching herself where the sun don't shine! She was screaming "my privates are pinched and I can't get up.... can someone help me?".... OH BOY!

Wow, I've never admitted that before. This is really empowering! Thanks, guys!

[Cathy S.]

Welcome Patti! I'm Cathy and I've broken two toilet seats, both in my bathroom. Until I came to this group I never had the courage to admit that I broke them. Thank you everyone for your support, I'm now free of the weight (no pun intended) of my awful secret.

[Rini]

LOL rini... I am the worst friend ever.. I will ask if someone is ok, then laugh at them...

Ok aa long time ago.. me, my BF, my older sis and my teenage niece went out and were ummm taking pumpkins unlawfully.. My friend went running out of the patch and fell off the curb.. She landed on the pumpkin and it popped out smacking her in the face.. My sis laughed so hard she pee'd her pants... I made her walk the mile to our parents so she could borrow pants.. I wouldn't let her in my car..
patti i'm so bad at that too i don't know what is wrong with me! One time my husband(then boyfriend) slipped down five stairs in college in front of one of the building right on his ass and it was all i could do to contain my nervous laughter. he was soooo mad!!!! lol but he got over it and eventually married me(god bless him)lol

[alucy1967]

Why do we laugh when someone gets totally hummiliated??? Strange creatures, we are.

[redgrldj]

Rini.. When I was dateing Sean he walked right into a sliding glass door.. I was like 18 and almost wet myself laughing.. His parents were pissed that I was laughing.. They were like he could have been hurt.. I was like well he deserved to be for being so dumb... Is it any wonder they aren't my biggest fans...

[Want_2_B_Free]

Which one to share?? Hmm.....

Toilet seats, been there too. At least I thought it was me. Could have been the DW before she had her GBS. I need to investigate that one.

One time at band camp, wait, wrong one.

So awhile back we went out to eat with the In-laws. I ate til my heart was content. I probaly should have stopped 2 plates prior. We were there for about 2 hrs and then it was time to go. Literally. I knew I should have "gone" before we left but it was only a 15 minute ride home. MISTAKE. My F-I-L was driving. My stomach wasn't in the mood for his driving and decided to give a toot so to hurry him up. I was so embarrassed I rolled the window down to help fan out the car. The In-laws were like what is that sewer smell in the air. I said you smell that too. At that point I asked my F-I-L to stop at a burger place so I could use the bathroom. He kept driving. I said to him, in my nicest son in law voice-If you don't stop, you will have sewer smell in here for a month. We stopped. Moral of the story-I need a band so I don't eat tons at dinner and fart in the In-Laws car.

[redgrldj]

LOL we were at a ducks game for a boy scout outting, LOL total nose bleed seats.. All of a sudden my DH takes a run for the stairs, almost tumbling down them in his rush to get to the mens room.. he almost had an umm accident... All I could think was OMG my son is gonna be known as the kid whose dad crapped his pants at the hockey game..

[Want_2_B_Free]

Went to the kidney Dr. last week for a check-up. He tells me to take my shirt off. I was standing there un-doing the buttons. As soon as I un-tucked the shirt, bam, pants go to the floor. I told him, I am sorry. I have lost some weight and my pants are loose. The shirt helps to hold them up. Glad I had on my boxers. I was so embarrassed. But I saw the positive; NSV for losing weight. LMAO...

[jomarie88]

lol those are too funny.

Monte - luckily the doc didn't pull out some dollar bills when your pants dropped! ;)

[Want_2_B_Free]

Trust me, if he did, he would want a refund. ROFLMAO...

[jomarie88]

lol can't be that bad....after all, you ARE married. I'm sure you've secretly done a striptease or two...lol

[newlifeat57]

Me, too..... three times ...... So here goes.... Hi, everyone, I'm Patti..... ("hi, Patti"). Hi... And um, well, see, I, um.... I break things sometimes..... um, yeah, just things, you know.... um, well, okay... um, toilet seats..... I am Patti, and I break toilet seats. The one at work... yep, that was me. The one in my upstairs bathroom.... yep, that was me, too. And oh yeah... the one in the downstairs bathroom... yep, guilty as charged. Never pinched myself, but I did hear it when a co-worker broke a toilet seat and was pinching herself where the sun don't shine! She was screaming "my privates are pinched and I can't get up.... can someone help me?".... OH BOY!

Wow, I've never admitted that before. This is really empowering! Thanks, guys!
Hi Patti..... I've pinched places I couldn't reach...... so embarrassing..

Rini.. When I was dateing Sean he walked right into a sliding glass door.. I was like 18 and almost wet myself laughing.. His parents were pissed that I was laughing.. They were like he could have been hurt.. I was like well he deserved to be for being so dumb... Is it any wonder they aren't my biggest fans...
I was invited to a fancy schmancy wedding where one of the Earnhardt's (not sure where his place in the family was) was the best man in my friend's wedding. Well, The reception was held in her home, and I was trying so hard to act like I belonged. The Margaritas were flowing and I had one in my hand as I tried to go through glass doors out into the patio. What a mess I made. For someone not trying to bring attention to herself..... I did exactly that. I made so much noise as I banged into those doors, that I'm surprised they didn't break. another fat girl's embarassing moment

Went to the kidney Dr. last week for a check-up. He tells me to take my shirt off. I was standing there un-doing the buttons. As soon as I un-tucked the shirt, bam, pants go to the floor. I told him, I am sorry. I have lost some weight and my pants are loose. The shirt helps to hold them up. Glad I had on my boxers. I was so embarrassed. But I saw the positive; NSV for losing weight. LMAO...
Congratulations Monte on the NSV. Sorry it caused embarrassment, tho.

[redgrldj]

LOL too funny... oh and I am the biggest Earnhardt Sr. fan everrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I cried during the movie about him...

[MoOrLess]

I have also broken toilet seats. I get so worried that one day I might pinch my butt skin between the seat and toilet. Can you imagine how much that would hurt with over 200 lbs of weight on it?

Brandy

um YES I can imagine lol

[MoOrLess]

Which one to share?? Hmm.....

Toilet seats, been there too. At least I thought it was me. Could have been the DW before she had her GBS. I need to investigate that one.

One time at band camp, wait, wrong one.

So awhile back we went out to eat with the In-laws. I ate til my heart was content. I probaly should have stopped 2 plates prior. We were there for about 2 hrs and then it was time to go. Literally. I knew I should have "gone" before we left but it was only a 15 minute ride home. MISTAKE. My F-I-L was driving. My stomach wasn't in the mood for his driving and decided to give a toot so to hurry him up. I was so embarrassed I rolled the window down to help fan out the car. The In-laws were like what is that sewer smell in the air. I said you smell that too. At that point I asked my F-I-L to stop at a burger place so I could use the bathroom. He kept driving. I said to him, in my nicest son in law voice-If you don't stop, you will have sewer smell in here for a month. We stopped. Moral of the story-I need a band so I don't eat tons at dinner and fart in the In-Laws car.

LOL ...too hysterical Monte!

[grandmarkay]

so funny...thanks for the laugh and giggles!

[Cathy S.]

Several weeks ago I attended some training classes for work. They were held in an auditorium with seats similar to theater seats, except these seats had swing up desk tops to write on. Well the desk top didn't quite fit over the top of my thighs, and the outsides of my thighs had bruises on them from squeezing into the seat.

[redgrldj]

Lol.. Omg....

[dswofford]

Hilarious guys

[NicoleM]

Oh my, I am reading this at work and actually cried because I was laughing so hard. The toilet seat talk hit a little too close to home . . .

[Firedoc19]

OK, as long as we are telling job stories as well. Picture this, my first day on the job as a new paramedic and I was out to save lives. the tones drop, I jump in the squad and I am on my way to save my first life for the day. We get there, I grab the narcotic case in one hand, the lifepak (EKG) iin the other and jump out of the truck and head up the walk. Get to the house and BOOM, yep walked right into their screen door (I was so ready to save their life, I forgot that you had to open the door before entering the house) I am not sure who was laughing harder the rest of my crew or the patient! Patient called for some "advice" and didn't even need resuscitation or anything, DARN! And, oh yeah, been there on the toilet seat thing too! Have a great day everyone.

[fish]

I sat on a chair in a doctor's office one day and the chair fell apart and I ended up on by back with all these people standing over me. I had to get help getting off the floor and they found me another stronger chair to set on. Waiting for the doctor hearing others snicker about me falling really made me mad. I guess we all have stories like this. I hope you did not get hurt.
Fish

[Flow9393]

I work for a seating company , and our Enginners came up with a " Heavy duty Chair" I was asked if I would like to try it out .... : ( Of course I showed that I was pleased , but I so didnt feel that way .... I had My surgery on 3-10-10, 13 pound DOWN !!!!! cant wait to tell them to take their "heavy Duty Chair " BACK !!!!!! hahah

[ginabobina]

I'm not sure how I stumbled onto this thread... I did not search on "toilet seat"!! But thanks for the laughs and maybe this will revive it. Shockingly I haven't broken a toilet seat but I did recently go to sit down in one of those collapsible camp chairs in our upstairs tv room andboom... all the way down to the floor. Mind you this is after losing 100 pounds and being under the weight limit! My husband almost fell on the floor with me after the split-second of "oh crap, are you hurt/going to have a breakdown?" HA! I had to laugh and thank the Lord it happened in the privacy of home!! the most annoying thing I have happen is my bra underwires break!!! So we need another club for those frequently stabbed in the boob by their underwire after it pops loudly in a room full of people - lol!! I blame it on the bra design not my girls :-)

[breezy]

Completely hysterical thread!!! LMAO!!!

kk, I have one....

This is like 15 years ago...We order subs for dinner one night and I volunteered to go and pick them up. Of I go in the then "new latest fashion in shoes"... slide mules. I'm feeling pretty happy-go-lucky and "hop" onto the sidewalk to enter the sub shop and I immediately get that tell-tell feeling of "OMG, am I going to fall??..No, dear Lord, say that I am not!!!...SPLAT!!!! Right in front of the entrance to the shop. Now, of course there were customers coming out of the shop as I was headed in so they were holding the door for me. When I tell you the man who was holding the door for me was going to burst! My goodness, he wanted to laugh sooo bad. He was as red as a beet. :pound:

Oh, noo..it's gets better!!! :nod:

As I tried to collect my thoughts, my purse, my keys, one of my shoes (that was now halfway down the sidewalk) and what was left of my dignity, the guy comes over to help me up. I politely decline his assistance and attempt to get up. Note: (Please remember that from a sitting/lying position for a 290+lb, out of shape person, this is far from an easy task) :sad: ..So, I start praying.."Lord, please help me up from this ground in front of these people so I can go my beyond-embarrased-butt home!" Well, as it turns out, the Lord has a sense of humor as well. Instead of getting up, I stumbled and fell right back down in front of the guy with his outstretched hand. :faint:At this point, no longer quite so polite, I sorta shoo'ed him away and said thanks but "I got it" and he walked away immediately. Probably because he was so very close to just cracking the hell up!!

I got my then sweaty pits up from there and went into the sub shop (under the scrutiny of all the customers who had front row seats by the window.) but only after I walked down the sidewalk to go pick up my damn shoe..stupid mules!!!

I think I tippy-tooed my way out the shop and to the car. Feeling and looking like an elephant trying to get across an ice rink!! :elephant:

Needless to say by the time I got home, I was not at all hungry anymore! :ohwell:

[MommaStone]

oh my goodness, ha-larious but SO embarrassing

[SixOfOne]

I broke the hammock the day before I left for vacation. Nearly gave myself whiplash.

[SixOfOne]

Also have broken one toilet seat...then, I started buying much better toilet seats...so now I have an intact seat on top but when you lift the seat, you can see the round plastic spacers are smashed to smithereens.

Oh and I have peed on myself lots. When u have an extra 200 pounds on your bladder, sneezing, coughing, laughing etc is like playing roulette. Have even done it at work and had to have hubby bring me scrub pants from home bc I was too big for any of the hospital's stock of scrubs.