PhotoNut
12-16-2007, 10:49 AM
I was responding to a post by VegasWildFlower (http://band2gether.net/showthread.php?t=5551) when I realized that what I wanted to share something that needed to be heard by everyone. Thus the creation of this thread. I hope it helps someone out there who may be going thru similar struggles.
As I read Vegas' post about her struggle with a band that was too tight, and about the tears she shed when her doctor pulled out all of her fill, I found myself reliving my own similar experience of a few months ago, when my mom was in the hospital and life was more stressful than ever.
I know well that feeling of lying on the table as the doc pulls out all of the protection -- I mean restriction. I cried too! I was empty for three weeks and during that time I acted a fool. It took me no time at all to realize that I could eat things I hadn't eaten in almost two years. I used my empty band as an excuse to act like an idiot and run right back to that which had nearly killed me -- food. Subsequently I gained 15 pounds.
Now fast forward to the refill. My doc put back exactly what I had prior to the unfill. And, yes, I cried when he put it all back!! It was the strangest thing to realize that I was experiencing the same emotions I had prior to surgery. I was crying over losing an old friend who had given me comfort in times of stress and upset -- food.
Both Vegas' doc and mine told us that it was very normal to gain 10-15 pounds when a band is completely unfilled. But they also assured us that, once we were refilled, the weight would quickly fall off again. And the docs were right! At least in my case - I think Vegas may still be empty. Anyway, the weight does quickly fall off again. Thank God! However....
It was only a week or two before I found myself experiencing the same problems which had caused the need for the unfill in the first place. I was too tight. I was sticking on any solid proteins, salads KILLED me, and... this one is very hard to admit to y'all, but here goes... I had begun sticking my finger down my throat to induce vomiting as a means of fast relief from the pain of being stuck. *sigh*
Now, after all this time of being banded, you'd think I would have learned a thing or two. You'd think I would know that my actions were those of someone who was NOT taking care of their health nor their band. But for some reason it had all become so common place for me that I really gave it no thought beyond the fact that it was a quick and easy way to get past the episodes that interfered with my busy schedule.
Then, last Monday night (Dec 10th) I attended the first support group I'd been able to go to in months. Due to the holiday season, our group was meeting a week earlier than usual. We were finally in the new hospital building with a REAL room of our own instead of the tent where we had met for the past two years! (That's a story of it's own! LOL) Anyway, the monthly lapband seminar, for those interested in the band, was also meeting on that night -- right across the hall from us. And Dr. Cahn, my band doc, was on stage talking to all of the hopeful candidates. When he finished his presentation, several of us from the support group were asked if we would mind coming across the hall to speak to the group and to share our band experiences. We were delighted to help out.
We were answering questions and wow'ing everyone with our reports of enormous weight loss, when someone in the audience asked, "Is there a time when you reach the right amount of restriction and no longer need adjustments?" After we all chuckled, I took on the question. I explained that adjustments would probably be an ongoing part of a bandster's life. I explained to the group that there is a wide variety of things that affect the amount restriction we have. Stress, pain, weight loss, a woman's time of the month... all of those things can cause the restriction levels to change. And as I was explaining how important it would be for them to stay in HONEST communication with their band doctors, I looked over at Dr. Cahn and it hit me right between the eyes. I was not practicing what I was preaching! I grinned at him as I continued speaking, "Never let yourself rely on foods that go down easily because your band is too tight to eat healthily. If you find yourself relying on crackers and milkshakes, you need to see your doctor for an adjustment." Dr. Cahn smiled and nodded, and I knew he understood.
After we finished, I went over and hugged my doc (I love that guy!) and he said quietly, "Call tomorrow and get an appointment." I assured him I would, but when the next morning arrived I found myself at his receptionists desk, saying, "Think you could squeeze me in?" And they did.
I chatted with my doc and told him about how I had lost that 15 pounds I had gained when my band was empty, and then I told him how I had gained all of it back by living on crackers and cream cheese for the last 6 weeks. I explained that every time I sat down to a healthy meal of chicken and steamed veggies or salad, I would end up stuck by the second bite. I admitted to then running to the bathroom and making myself throw up until the offending piece of food was gone. And then I admitted to coming out of the bathroom and heading straight for those crackers and cream cheese because I was HUNGRY! Sure, I wasn't eating a big meal, only snacking, so it never seemed like I was eating much. How did I gain 15 pounds??!!
Well, 4oz of chicken breast and 1/2 cup of veggies has about 200 calories. But 5 Ritz crackers have 80 calories, and 2 tablespoons of Garden veggie cream cheese (hey, I was being responsible and buying the Light stuff) is 60 calories. I'm guessing there are at least 30 crackers in each individual package of Ritz, so lets do the math -- 5 crackers, 80 calories x 6 = 480 calories, add on at least 1/2 the container of cream cheese and that's an additional 210 calories, totaling 690 for one snack! :eek:
Where am I now? Well, I have found that with 1cc (down from 2.8cc) I can eat 4oz of chicken and salad with no trouble at all. I actually get that bandster-type full feeling and I don't even think about snacking. I'm no longer hungry! And most importantly, I'm not in the bathroom, suffering with my finger down my throat. It's really all about getting back to the basics, isn't it?
I've been banded nearly two years. I've lost 130 pounds and gained back 15 of those. And yet I was doing the very thing I have warned people about -- don't live with a tight band! I was putting my band and my health at risk.
I love my band. I no longer weigh 307 pounds because of my band. My band has held me steady through some amazingly difficult times which, in the past, would have caused me to regain all the lost weight and more. My band reminds me daily that I have a real friend now. Food was never my friend. My band saved my life and continues to protect me. And even so, I was doing things which I knew could cost me my precious band.
To return to the question from the audience, "Is there a time when you reach the right amount of restriction and no longer need adjustments?" The answer is NO. Life is all about making adjustments. Life changes daily. We change daily. So, never ever ever forget to stop and re-evaluate your current situation. A minor adjustment could save you a lot of grief, pain, and sorrow.
Thanks for listening.
*hugs*
As I read Vegas' post about her struggle with a band that was too tight, and about the tears she shed when her doctor pulled out all of her fill, I found myself reliving my own similar experience of a few months ago, when my mom was in the hospital and life was more stressful than ever.
I know well that feeling of lying on the table as the doc pulls out all of the protection -- I mean restriction. I cried too! I was empty for three weeks and during that time I acted a fool. It took me no time at all to realize that I could eat things I hadn't eaten in almost two years. I used my empty band as an excuse to act like an idiot and run right back to that which had nearly killed me -- food. Subsequently I gained 15 pounds.
Now fast forward to the refill. My doc put back exactly what I had prior to the unfill. And, yes, I cried when he put it all back!! It was the strangest thing to realize that I was experiencing the same emotions I had prior to surgery. I was crying over losing an old friend who had given me comfort in times of stress and upset -- food.
Both Vegas' doc and mine told us that it was very normal to gain 10-15 pounds when a band is completely unfilled. But they also assured us that, once we were refilled, the weight would quickly fall off again. And the docs were right! At least in my case - I think Vegas may still be empty. Anyway, the weight does quickly fall off again. Thank God! However....
It was only a week or two before I found myself experiencing the same problems which had caused the need for the unfill in the first place. I was too tight. I was sticking on any solid proteins, salads KILLED me, and... this one is very hard to admit to y'all, but here goes... I had begun sticking my finger down my throat to induce vomiting as a means of fast relief from the pain of being stuck. *sigh*
Now, after all this time of being banded, you'd think I would have learned a thing or two. You'd think I would know that my actions were those of someone who was NOT taking care of their health nor their band. But for some reason it had all become so common place for me that I really gave it no thought beyond the fact that it was a quick and easy way to get past the episodes that interfered with my busy schedule.
Then, last Monday night (Dec 10th) I attended the first support group I'd been able to go to in months. Due to the holiday season, our group was meeting a week earlier than usual. We were finally in the new hospital building with a REAL room of our own instead of the tent where we had met for the past two years! (That's a story of it's own! LOL) Anyway, the monthly lapband seminar, for those interested in the band, was also meeting on that night -- right across the hall from us. And Dr. Cahn, my band doc, was on stage talking to all of the hopeful candidates. When he finished his presentation, several of us from the support group were asked if we would mind coming across the hall to speak to the group and to share our band experiences. We were delighted to help out.
We were answering questions and wow'ing everyone with our reports of enormous weight loss, when someone in the audience asked, "Is there a time when you reach the right amount of restriction and no longer need adjustments?" After we all chuckled, I took on the question. I explained that adjustments would probably be an ongoing part of a bandster's life. I explained to the group that there is a wide variety of things that affect the amount restriction we have. Stress, pain, weight loss, a woman's time of the month... all of those things can cause the restriction levels to change. And as I was explaining how important it would be for them to stay in HONEST communication with their band doctors, I looked over at Dr. Cahn and it hit me right between the eyes. I was not practicing what I was preaching! I grinned at him as I continued speaking, "Never let yourself rely on foods that go down easily because your band is too tight to eat healthily. If you find yourself relying on crackers and milkshakes, you need to see your doctor for an adjustment." Dr. Cahn smiled and nodded, and I knew he understood.
After we finished, I went over and hugged my doc (I love that guy!) and he said quietly, "Call tomorrow and get an appointment." I assured him I would, but when the next morning arrived I found myself at his receptionists desk, saying, "Think you could squeeze me in?" And they did.
I chatted with my doc and told him about how I had lost that 15 pounds I had gained when my band was empty, and then I told him how I had gained all of it back by living on crackers and cream cheese for the last 6 weeks. I explained that every time I sat down to a healthy meal of chicken and steamed veggies or salad, I would end up stuck by the second bite. I admitted to then running to the bathroom and making myself throw up until the offending piece of food was gone. And then I admitted to coming out of the bathroom and heading straight for those crackers and cream cheese because I was HUNGRY! Sure, I wasn't eating a big meal, only snacking, so it never seemed like I was eating much. How did I gain 15 pounds??!!
Well, 4oz of chicken breast and 1/2 cup of veggies has about 200 calories. But 5 Ritz crackers have 80 calories, and 2 tablespoons of Garden veggie cream cheese (hey, I was being responsible and buying the Light stuff) is 60 calories. I'm guessing there are at least 30 crackers in each individual package of Ritz, so lets do the math -- 5 crackers, 80 calories x 6 = 480 calories, add on at least 1/2 the container of cream cheese and that's an additional 210 calories, totaling 690 for one snack! :eek:
Where am I now? Well, I have found that with 1cc (down from 2.8cc) I can eat 4oz of chicken and salad with no trouble at all. I actually get that bandster-type full feeling and I don't even think about snacking. I'm no longer hungry! And most importantly, I'm not in the bathroom, suffering with my finger down my throat. It's really all about getting back to the basics, isn't it?
I've been banded nearly two years. I've lost 130 pounds and gained back 15 of those. And yet I was doing the very thing I have warned people about -- don't live with a tight band! I was putting my band and my health at risk.
I love my band. I no longer weigh 307 pounds because of my band. My band has held me steady through some amazingly difficult times which, in the past, would have caused me to regain all the lost weight and more. My band reminds me daily that I have a real friend now. Food was never my friend. My band saved my life and continues to protect me. And even so, I was doing things which I knew could cost me my precious band.
To return to the question from the audience, "Is there a time when you reach the right amount of restriction and no longer need adjustments?" The answer is NO. Life is all about making adjustments. Life changes daily. We change daily. So, never ever ever forget to stop and re-evaluate your current situation. A minor adjustment could save you a lot of grief, pain, and sorrow.
Thanks for listening.
*hugs*