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Jill
08-07-2007, 10:50 AM
... or, why I feel like a fraud anyway.

I went and spent the weekend with my folks this past weekend. The area that they live in is a small tight-knit (pretty much) group of people who all go to dinner on Saturday nights. I've met them all over the years.

When we got to dinner, I had two people tell me that I was 'so skinny!' and then when I said that I had 10 pounds to go, I got asked where it was going to come from -- was I sure I really needed to lose 10 more?

...and I felt like a fraud for some reason.

No matter that I can now put on a pair of size 10 jeans, zipped and all without laying down. No matter that my bra band size is now a 36. No matter that I've donated 100's of pieces of clothing over the last 2 years because it was all too big and no matter that I can actually get into a L shirt from a regular store.....

...I still feel like a fraud when I look in the mirror.

The shirts must be over-sized. The jeans, too. My bra has to be too small! How could I possibly fit into a normal sized bra and clothes? I still look in the mirror and see a huge tummy, thighs, my arms are more like wings than arms....

I have a horrible body image. Dysmorphia at it's finest.

I will never feel 'normal'. There are 10 more pounds to go until I'm 170 (at 5'9.5"). Then there is surgery to get rid of all this skin.

But I'm guessing even then I'm still going to feel huge, and like a fraud, until I can find a way to get real with what I see.

/sigh

One step up and two steps back.

MelissaZ
08-07-2007, 11:31 AM
Jill, you are such an inspiration. Look at all the weight you lost. You are beautiful and one of these times when you look in the mirror it will click and you will realize it too.

mizfish
08-08-2007, 08:21 AM
Jill,
you have worked so hard to get to where you are. YOU DID IT, not anyone else! You took the steps needed to acheive your goal. You are such an inspiration to all of us. Take the time to learn to feel comfortable in your own skin. Take loads of pictures and compare them to your old. Keep visual reminders of your accomplishments. It was you that chose to eat something healthier instead of several bars of chocolate! You certainly are not a fraud. Be positive! Unfortunately we see images in the media everyday which are unrealistic. Yeah, wouldn't it be nice to be the size of whichever celebrity you choose. But the world would be such a boring place if everyone looked exactly the same. Embrace your positive attributes. I'm sure that you have loads of them!:nod:

munch2much
08-09-2007, 09:49 AM
Hey, I understand! When I want to be something that takes loads of hard work, and then I finally achieve it, I also feel like a fraud (like when I graduated from college with my RN degree. I guess I just couldn't believe in myself enough to know I really did it. Low self esteem I guess. I think we all share some of these issues. Maybe we will never quite believe what we can accomplish. That's why support group groups are so great. Sharon