Back to Band Basics....

[brelee85]

I am 4 months post op and i have fallen off the wagon...cant seem to get back up. What is going in with me? Ive been making TERRIBLE food choices and the gym just hasnt seemed that important. I told myself that July was going to be my super month, the month that i return to basics and follow the rules. Has that happened? Not yet. What the heck am i waiting for? I just dont understand what is holding me back. I live a semi stressful life...but nothing has changed since ive been banded. My stress level has been the same.

I am about 80% to blame here. the other 20% is because I NEED a fill. It is way too easy for me to overeat, even when im eating band friendly foods. I try the one cup portions, with protein first...and im hungry less than 30 mins after I eat. I feel like a failure already. Part of me thinks ive already lost this battle. Then i remember that i am ONLY 4 months in...and i have MY lifetime ahead of me. Why do i already feel defeated? There are so many people out there that think the band is a cure all, fix all. WRONG!!! In order to lose the weight.. i have to work my a$$ off, literally. I know how to do it... i have all the resources to do so.....Why am i stuck???????? I cant grasp the reason. Its almost as if i know what i need to do, and i know i can do it...but im being held back by an invisible force. I just cant break the boundary.

Ive also learned that I dont possess the ability to just say NO. If i have it, I'll eat it. And because of that....I've made a promise to myself to just not have it anymore. I just cant let food sit there... not sure why. Brings a whole new meaning to "Out of sight, Out of mind"... I just dont want to give up now. I have always let myself down. always. I cant think of one thing that i have successfully done for myself. Other people...yeah. I am probably the most reliable person you will ever know. When someone needs help, or they need to talk....im there. In an instant. I dont like letting people down... but i dont hold that standard for myself. Am I screwed up, or what?


I did hit a plateau in my weight loss...but im not even sure i can call it that. i MESSED up my weight loss. I picked up some old, dormant, unhealthy habits...and did it without even acknowledging it. It just felt like life as i knew it. Im really having a major wake up call today. I need to be honest with myself...and that is what im doing here. It is still early, right? Can i turn this around? I want to continue to be a success story. Ive lost 45 lbs so far!

I need advice. What did you do when you were stuck? Any tips or suggestions...throw them this way! I am begging for some support- and I know i can find it here.

p.s.... ironically, i fell off the wagon when i stopped visiting b2g everyday. :wink2:

sorry for the novel- I've always enjoyed writing. LOL

[MommaStone]

Brelee,

First congratulations on acknowledging that you need to make some changes. Now, you've acknowledged it, stop beating yourself up about it. You are not a failure nor is this something you can't change. You say you need a fill, any particular reason you aren't getting one? Also, purge the foods that are your triggers from your house. And set mini goals. So, rather than setting goals for the month or the week, set them for the day. Really go back to basics, measure your food, log your food--honestly writing down everything you eat --that's usually enough to kick me back in gear. I also can identify with your p.s. Coming here every day (usually more than once) keeps me focused.

Do you need new recipes? Were you in a food rut? Since it's summer, lots of good fruits and veggies around. Hang in there and keep us posted.

[brelee85]

Im starting a new job on Monday and I still dont know what my new schedule will look like. Im waiting until i find out, then i will schedule my fill. Im also a bit hesitant to call my surgeons office...The fill nurse is a real witch. She makes you feel like a pile of crap, to say the least. But im not going to let that stop me... this is my journey, not hers. Its just unfortunate that she has to be included. lol. So, its just a schedule thing. Im going from a Tues-Sat position to a Mon-Fri position...same company just diff business unit.

I do need to set mini goals, i agree. I also need to re-commit to my b2g addiction. Ive looked around at other forums/youtube...but theres no place like b2g. LOL.

When i comes to food... im in a weird situation. I only hand select about 10% of the groceries. My mother in law is the main shopper. My hubby and i each work 40+ hours a week and she has been ever so kind to help with the kids and man the house. We are a close knit family and she knows how important this is to me. She buys all the right things and I dont have any complaints there. She cooks really well...and ive always loved her food. lol. I just need to know my limits. AND.. i have to stop once ive had enough. Its when im at work that i dont behave. ugh...and Im at work almost more than im at home. It doesnt bother me to have cookies and chips in our pantry (the MIL, Kids, and hubby enjoy them)... I have given in a few times..but I was 100% aware of it. Its just a work problem. LOL. Looks like i need to quit my job! I do need to log my food. for sure. Do you manually log on paper? Or do you log online? Thank you for the feedback... i really do need it right now! I CAN do this..ive just CHOSEN not to. ugh. smack, smack, smack... Im trying to hold myself accountable for these nasty feelings... so far, its working. lol. I feel terrible. But its a new day and i need to take my journey a day at a time.

[pollyo]

Welcome back, we've missed you!

On top of what Momma says: you know we all got fat for important reasons, and they weren't just that we love food and love to eat. Your unconscious is trying to use the old coping skill, and so you are having a tough time. Life doesn't have to be especially stressful anymore to trigger it, either-- these habits are worn into very deep grooves, and deep down we believe being fat is safe, for whatever reason. It will probably take us the rest of our lives to reprogram that message.

In the meantime, do what you know keeps you conscious of your goals: come to the forums, clear your house of junk, get back to the gym, and think about maybe getting some added support with a counselor. Is there anything more important than that?

Good luck and keep us posted. We have all been there, and we will all be there again. We have a better chance of fighting it if we get help from each other instead of cookies. :)

[brelee85]

Welcome back, we've missed you!

On top of what Momma says: you know we all got fat for important reasons, and they weren't just that we love food and love to eat. Your unconscious is trying to use the old coping skill, and so you are having a tough time. Life doesn't have to be especially stressful anymore to trigger it, either-- these habits are worn into very deep grooves, and deep down we believe being fat is safe, for whatever reason. It will probably take us the rest of our lives to reprogram that message.

In the meantime, do what you know keeps you conscious of your goals: come to the forums, clear your house of junk, get back to the gym, and think about maybe getting some added support with a counselor. Is there anything more important than that?

Good luck and keep us posted. We have all been there, and we will all be there again. We have a better chance of fighting it if we get help from each other instead of cookies. :)


but the cookies dont talk back!!!! lol. JK! I agree, 100%. Odd thing is, I LOVE the gym. I get such a workout high afterwards. Cant get enough of the feeling. I honestly just think i hit a little speedbump and i need to get back in the groove. I love what you mentioned about the whole being fat for a reason deal...hit so close to home. Fat is safety for me. People know me this way...and If i stay this way, it wont be letting anyone down. They already know me as being overweight. hmmm. Thats a terrible mindset, i know.

[MoOrLess]

I agree, I think we go non-stop when we have band surgery and then the reality of our every day lives hit a stop sign! It all finally catches up with us. Remember it does NOT have to be an all or nothing mentality living a banded life - the band is a tool - use it the best way you know how.

Start by measuring your food out - put it on a SMALL plate - it will overwhelm the plate and you'll be surprised as you make this habit how you do not need more food. Protein first ALWAYS - I guarantee it will fill you up. Chew slowly - get back to the basics. CALL the office for a fill - don't worry about the mean nurse -- but DO talk to your surgeon about how you feel you are treated when you call. You might be pleasantly surprised at the response you get.

Make the gym a habit that goes along with working - something you just have to do. You like it so no problem once you are there! Finally, all of this means that you have to put YOU first - it's easy to get lost in the shuffle of everyday life and taking care of kids...you have already been successful, continue and stop beating yourself up. It IS just a speed bump in the road. Hugs :)

[brelee85]

big THANKS!!!! I am so happy i found my way back to b2g!

[Jezzibelle]

Hey Sweety! I was just wondering about you!
First, 45 pounds! congrats! Second, I nearly always use a small plate, like a small salad plate for my meals. It tricks your brain into thinking there is more food than there is. Remember to eat slowly so that you don't get overfull. I'm proud of you for being brave enough to acknowledge that you are having a difficult time and are seeking help getting through it! We're here for you!!

XOXO
Jezzy

[brelee85]

Hey Sweety! I was just wondering about you!
First, 45 pounds! congrats! Second, I nearly always use a small plate, like a small salad plate for my meals. It tricks your brain into thinking there is more food than there is. Remember to eat slowly so that you don't get overfull. I'm proud of you for being brave enough to acknowledge that you are having a difficult time and are seeking help getting through it! We're here for you!!

XOXO
Jezzy


Thank You so much! Yeah, im back. lol. Life has just been busy, thats all. But..ive noticed that i need my b2g support.

[brelee85]

Ive been doing a lot of thinking today....wow, brain kinda hurts. LOL. Ive decided that im going to stick it out for the month of July, without a fill. I want to give everyday my absolute best at following the rules. Come August 1st, i will re-evaluate my need for a fill. I really want to get back to band basics before i shock myself with another fill. If after 3 weeks of following the rules and still feeling that emptiness, i will schedule my 2nd fill. I need to go to band boodcamp! lol

[MommaStone]

Go Breelee!

I use MyPlate on Livestrong.com It is free, has a large database of foods, tracks exercise, water, automatically tracks your protein, carbs, etc. I find it very easy to use.

[Mrs Sabre]

I ditto what everyone else says. I journal food, exercise, & life on paper ... just my personal preference and doesn't require electricity.

I'd also suggest reading "The Beck Diet Solution: How to Train Your Brain to Think Like A Thin Person" by Judith Beck. It helps with the head work ... which tends to be the bigger issue with us WLS patients?

Keep up the good work; you can do this!

[brelee85]

i agree! I have done really well today. I went on a 4.5 mile walk/jog before work this morning. Finished in under 60mins. woohoo! NSV for me! My food choices have been excellent and my water has been awesome as well. I am hungry between meals...but that may go away after staying on track for a while. My body will stop craving the junk. Im trying to just sip water when i feel the hunger set in.

[Patrick]

Congratulations for your achievement. You have already done a huge step by recognizing when you need help. You not only can, but you will do this. You know when to ask for support and you respond to the stimuli that follows. You are destined for success.

[mindwing]

I am five months out from surgery--still with no fill because I can't get a ride to Sacramento for one. I lost 60 lbs before surgery, and after surgery I stopped losing. Lost nothing on the post op liquid diet. Lost nothing on mushies or any other stage. Got good at eating bandster food, but I couldn't seem to stop eating, either. I had some days where I ate foods I missed, but refused to beat myself up.

The months slipped by and the scale seemed stuck on the same weight. I wondered if it was broken--but it worked for my skinny hubby.

I kept trying to limit my calories, and kept failing. Then a week or so ago it felt like a switch turned on in me. I am following the bandster diet with very few carbs. I am starting to lose weight.

So don't beat yourself up if you are following the rules (mostly). I think my body had to get used to the new weight before I could lose again. I looked like a failure because I stayed at the same weight for almost five months--lost nothing after the surgery until the last week or so.

I think coming here a lot is a big help. I come and read, even if I am too sick to write. And I have been too sick to exercise, so losing is hard. But I keep coming here and I keep remembering the bandster rules. Because I can't exercise, I have to go on the Atkins--whick is just the bandster diet with fewer carbs. Like I can afford carbs when I am in a wheelchair. I nibble on tiny bits of berries (had 5 blackberries this AM and have dried strawberries on the counter, and nibble a few slices a day) eat salads (Using my meat as part of the dressing) twice a day and always have onions with my meat. Planning on broccolli soup for a a few days. Eat dried cherry tomatoes, and hope the freah ones ripen soon, so I get plenty of veggies. I just avoid breadstuffs and pastas and starchy veggies.

One thing I find helps is to drink a lot of water a half hour before eating. I have read that being thirsty makes you eat more, and find it is true for me. I also drink a lot during the day. When I feel hungry I drink about 16 oz. of water before I get anything to eat. After waiting the half hour so I can eat, I find I'm usually not as hungry.

I think it is important to remember this is a new lifestyle and not just a diet. There will be times the scale doesn't move, and there will be times we eat something wrong. As long as we get right back on track, and keep eating the right things, sooner or later the weight will come off. I'm thrilled my weight stayed the same for five months instead of climbing. That is a major victory for me. if I have to diet strictly and let four months or so pass between diets, I don't mind as long as I don't gain weight during the rest periods. Of course, I hope things improve as I get fills--Oooh, I so want a fill!!

Good luck and keep trying. If you don't give up you will eventually succeed.

Leona

[MoOrLess]

Kudos for hanging in there. It IS funny how that switch goes on, isn't it? I find in my 4th year banded, the switch still goes on and off (in my mind, and physically it happens). You are so right, water is key, it flushes our system and does fill us up. Keep doing what you're doing - the scale WILL move.

[brelee85]

Sorry for being MIA...AGAIN! hahahaha. i started a new job on the 11th and life has been insane since then! I have been doing really well and keeping myself aware of what i am eating. I DO in fact need a fill...I will schedule that soon. Its seems that i have a great group of co workers that are willing to swap schedules whenever someone needs something. So...that will be happening soon. Im still alive!!! Lovin my B2G family!!!

[Patrick]

Glad to hear that you still have that positive attitude. That is a very necessary step to success.

[MoOrLess]

Just coming back here is the first and best step -- staying accountable to yourself will keep you on track! Hang in there - we all get pretty busy and things get pretty hectic but our bands wait for us :)